Saying goodbye.

Saying goodbye. 

I spent my whole life living in Texas until my 33^rd year.  I had traveled around the world a bit but Texas had always been home.  I always knew I would leave one day I just didn't know when or where I would go.  It was a bitterly cold day in February when I left everything in Texas to move to another country. 

After being laid off in 2011 my husband went back to school to get his MBA.  Upon graduating from the program he was offered the opportunity of a lifetime in his native country of Colombia.  I don’t think we ever thought that we would actually live in Colombia, nor did we think that such an opportunity would present itself there.  However, the opportunity was just too good to pass up for my husband’s career and for our family. 

Once a formal offer was made and things were set in motion the whole process was quite surreal.  I had so many questions, many of which I had to just guess the answers to because I had zero experience with relocating to a foreign country.  What would we do with our house?  All of our stuff?  How would we move our things from the U.S. to Colombia?  What would we do with our dogs?  I began packing up our home box by box.  My husband went to Colombia ahead of us to get started on his new job so I was home packing with a two year old and a newborn baby in tow.  I had so many emotions.  I was so excited, and nervous and terrified all at the same time.  I remember that I kept thinking, “Are we really leaving?  Is this really happening?” 

Moving day grew closer and closer and then it finally came.  The day before we were to take a flight with our two children and two dogs to Colombia our friends from church came to help us move just about everything we owned into a storage unit.  It is outrageously expensive to ship your things overseas so we determined that we could take 4 suitcases and two large boxes with us to Colombia.  That’s it; our whole lives were in those suitcases.  We took only the necessities which consisted of clothes, a few household items and toys for the kids. 

That night after we had moved everything out of our house we had only a mattress left in the house to sleep on that night.  The house was so empty.  We had only lived in the house for four years but it already had so many memories in it.  We brought both of our children home from the hospital as newborns to that house.  There was so much laughter echoing from the now empty walls of that house. 

The weather was terrible the next day; I thought they might cancel our flight.  There were a series of mix-ups and delays at the airport but after several hours we finally boarded our flight for Bogota, Colombia.  I didn't know when I would see Texas again.  I felt like I was leaving a piece of myself there.  We were moving on to bigger things and new adventures but Texas would always be my real home no matter where I roamed.  I don’t know if I will ever live there again, but a big piece of my heart will always remain there.  

My heart might explode.

Do you ever have those moments where you feel like your heart is going to explode and you might begin to cry like a blubbering idiot at any moment?  I have had a lot of those moments lately and I’m not exactly sure why.  It’s like a feeling of gratitude, and hope, and despair, and happiness and anguish all at once.  It makes me feel like I have an atomic bomb of emotions sitting inside my chest that might go off at any minute. 

I had one of those atomic bomb moments tonight.  I attended a church event tonight where a soldier from the Colombian army gave a short speech.  As he spoke, I felt all of these emotions building inside of me and I started to cry.  The soldier speaking had both arms amputated at the elbows and a glass eye.  He said that he was so grateful that God gave him a second chance at life, and that he was so happy to live in a safe Colombia.  The young man also said he was grateful not to have to invest in wristwatches anymore and that he loved hearing our applause because he cannot hear his own.  This guy didn’t choose this life (military service is compulsory in Colombia) but he is going forward with it full speed ahead. 

Unfortunately you see men like this all over Colombia.  You would be hard pressed to go even one day without seeing a soldier missing a limb.  It is shocking at first, the number of young amputees that you see in Colombia.  They are everywhere and the reason is the high number of landmines in Colombia.  Members of the Colombian army are often maimed as a result of the landmines planted by the FARC, ELN and various paramilitary groups.  The ongoing conflict between these groups and the Colombian government has led to 65% of the country being affected by landmines and nearly 10,000 Colombians have been victims since 1990.  The situation in the country has drastically improved over the last several years but decades of war have left the country full of landmines that now need to be demined. 

I was so touched by the soldier that spoke and he made me feel grateful; grateful for his service to his country and for the service of all military personnel around the world.  Evil people are everywhere; the FARC in Colombia, ISIS in Syria, etc. and these people are literally giving life and limb to thwart them so that we can enjoy our lives and all of the beauty that a free life has to offer.  There was something so beautiful about his gratitude in spite of the disability that he has been left with. 

I think the reason that my heart almost exploded was because the gratitude and happiness of the soldier was contagious; it spilled over into my heart.  I hope that someday my outlook on life can be that influential on others but right now I will just settle for being happy.  

Extraordinary moments.

Remarkable things happen each and every day all over the world.  We hear about them on the news, see them in our social media feeds and sometimes they even happen to us personally.  Sometimes, we can go days even months without anything significant happening in our own lives and sometimes extraordinary things happen more than once in a single day.  What defines a remarkable or extraordinary moment?  And how is it that we can go for long periods of time without anything of note happening in our lives?  Have you ever met a person who seems to have great things happening all the time?  Are they lying or is it their outlook on life that yields great personal events?  Today, I would wager that it is our outlook that yields happiness, greatness, and extraordinariness; whatever you might want to call it.   

I often get caught up in my daily routine of working, paying the bills and taking care of the kids and think nothing important is happening to me.  I get sucked into a humdrum way of life and forget that there is a whole wide world happening right outside my door.  My typical day consists of being woken from slumber by a screaming child, or maybe even two children screaming in unison.  I change diapers, I dress them, I feed them.  Then we play.  Then I change diapers, I feed them, I play with them.   You get the idea.  You can see how this might get monotonous and one might start to think that life is a little uneventful but every once in a while I’m able to see that there are so many great moments in between the feeding, and diapering, and playing that make life remarkable.  One might even have enough clarity during the feeding, diapering, playing to see that these moments are great too. 

I also occasionally have interesting, out of the ordinary things happen to me or in my presence that I am able to witness.  Today on the street while walking with my husband to a movie, I saw a toddler walking around with no pants on.  This is not a normal occurrence in Colombia despite what you might think.  He was part of a group of indigenous people.  I was not able to determine if they were homeless or just extremely poor but they were needy to say the least.  There are about 4 million internally displaced persons in Colombia due to the long-running internal conflict between rebel groups and the government.  The situation in the country has improved drastically over the last several years but a definite problem still exists.  The group of people that I saw today was most likely internally displaced because they were pushed off of their land by a rebel group, which lead them to the city to try and find a place to call home again.  As a mother I was so touched by this bare bottomed little boy.  I teared up right there on the street.  For me this was an extraordinary moment.  It was extraordinary because despite their circumstances these people continue on with the day to day of life.  The child was carefree, living in the moment. 

So you see, sometimes the universe gives us moments to think about and decide if they are significant.  That simple moment of seeing a little child running around on a street corner made an impact on me that will affect my day tomorrow and the interactions that I have with my own children.  I hope that I can live in the moment and not worry so much about what comes next.  We all want answers about tomorrow and we miss the answers that are right in front of us. 

Information on internally displaced persons in Colombia: 

http://www.unhcr.org/pages/49e492ad6.html

http://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2013/aug/12/colombia-internally-displaced-people-instability

Choices

As I sat watching my daughter and son play this morning I started wondering what their future would be like.  Will they have opportunities to thrive and expand their minds?  Will they be challenged by life or will it be easy?  Will they have to make difficult choices?  Will they have choices at all?  The answer to this is probably yes, all of the above.  My children like myself were fortunate to have been born in the United States of America where we have many choices be they trivial or of great importance; we control a large part of our own destiny in the United States. 

I think about choice a lot because I am living outside of the United States in Bogota, Colombia where I see the world from a different perspective.  Not just choices in Colombia but around the world.  For example, I was born in the United States to a middle class, white family.  I had many opportunities; public school, ballet class, plenty of food to eat, etc.  When I became a young adult I was able to make the choice to go to university, to study liberal arts, and to live in a tiny yet cozy apartment.  After college I chose to marry a man that I was very much in love with.  I chose to continue my studies, be a teacher and later on start a family.  I chose all of this.  My family didn’t have a lot but I was able to make some good decisions that resulted in a nice life for myself.  I had the freedom to make these choices which allowed for this life.  Many individuals around the world simply don’t have this. 

In comparison, I’ve learned a lot about the lack of choices that some people have by speaking to a woman I’ll call Sara.  She was born very poor.  Her father was a violent alcoholic who beat her mother.  The family was constantly moving and she was always changing schools.  At 13 years of age she became a maid, and has been ever since.  Today she is still extremely poor and her life is full of challenges that many Americans frankly could never survive.    She really had no choice in her destiny and there was no one telling her that there might be alternatives to her dismal life. 

You are probably wondering what my point is with all of this.  The point is that we all have choices which vary in degree depending on our geography and family background.  I have the freedom to do pretty much anything I want, and I’m grateful for this.  Others are not so lucky.  I always tell my students that everyone is doing the best that they possibly can.  Someone else’s best may not be as good as your best, but they are doing the best that they know how with the choices that they been given in life.  Give people the benefit of the doubt and remember everyone is doing the best they can.  A maid is not a maid because she is lazy or ignorant; a maid is a maid because she did the best she could with the hand she was dealt in life.  I’m not a teacher and writer because I’m particularly smart or witty, I’m a teacher and writer because I did the best I could with the choices I had.  So next time you are annoyed with the guy at the drive through or you see beggars on the street when you visit a third world country give them a break and remember their choices were probably a lot different than yours.  

How to make enchiladas in Bogota.

How to make enchiladas in Bogota. 

Let me first start by saying that it seems that every country has some sort of national cuisine except for The United States.  We are such a melting pot that we have a little bit of everything  but if I were to classify the cuisine of Texas where I hail from I would call it anything fried (even vegetables), TexMex, casserole, gravy soaked.  We are very eclectic with our food in the United States which makes it very hard for this gringa to cook anything in Bogota.

 Traditional Colombian food is very simple and reminds me a bit of typical southern food.  Contrary to what some Americans might believe it is not spicy at all.  There are no chiles or peppers.  The food mostly consists of large red beans, white rice, meat, white potatoes.  There are many variations of this and I don’t pretend that this is all that the locals eat here (there many types of soups, fish, etc. as well) but those are the basics of the Colombian meal as I have come to know it. 

I am not a great cook but I do love food and I love to eat.  I spend a large part of my day thinking about what I’m going to eat next.  Most of the dishes that I know how to make come off of the back of a Campbell’s soup can.  I never really learned how to cook until I got married and let’s face it my mom was about the same caliber of chef that I am so there was no family cooking tradition to really pass on.  So it should be no surprise that when I arrived in Bogota I promptly found an empleada (maid) to cook for myself and my family.  She is an amazing cook and makes everything from scratch.  My daughter who survived on macaroni and cheese in Texas loves her soups and arroz con pollo (chicken and rice).   The ingredients are all very natural, not a lot of processed food here.  Of course globalization is helping the American ways to creep into the Colombian diet but that is a whole other issue. 

I was very content eating the local fare but last week I was feeling homesick and wanted some comfort food (i.e. processed food).  I decided I wanted to make an enchilada casserole, simple right?  Wrong.  The typical ingredients for enchiladas a la gringa typically include corn tortillas, canned enchilada sauce, chicken, and shredded “Mexican” cheese; see I told you I can’t cook.  You cannot walk into just any supermarket in Colombia and find these ingredients.  I took a trip to one of the stores that carry this sort of processed, canned, goodness to acquire my ingredients.  First of all, anything in a can or box is imported in this country making it outrageously expensive because Colombians don’t typically eat food out of cans as do our refined American relatives.  Second, they don’t always have exactly what a gringa needs to make said processed food, hence the whole reason for this little story; they didn’t have what I needed so I had to improvise.  I found the tortillas, chicken, and sauce that I needed but could not for the life of me find shredded “Mexican” or even cheddar cheese so I proceeded to go to three different stores looking for cheese.  Some people I asked knew what it was but said yeah, we are all out of that.  I ended up finding an imported jar of “queso”.  If you are from Texas you know what that is, a jar of gooey processed cheese for dipping tortilla chips.  I poured it all over the top of my enchilada concoction instead of the shredded cheese and stuck it in the oven after I looked up the Fahrenheit to Celsius conversion online because I have already learned that just turning your oven up to oh say 400 or so is not a good idea. 

The dish came out looking a bit more like yellow colored lasagna but my husband declared that it was great and named it Texican Lasagna but I would call it something more like White Trash Lasagna.  Whatever you want to call it, it was good and satisfied my craving for something cheesy and processed.  It cost me about $20 to make due to import prices but I think it was worth it because there are no leftovers in the fridge, we ate it all.  

These are a few of my favorite things….about Bogota.

My family and I picked up and left everything we knew and loved in Texas about 6 months ago to move to Bogota, Colombia.  My husband had a job opportunity here that we just couldn’t pass up.  While I am a Texan through and through I have grown to love my newly adopted city of Bogota.  These are a few of my favorite things about Bogota that will be hard to leave if we ever go back to the United States. 

1.       The weather-The weather is amazing here!  There are no seasons so the temperature stays about the same year round.  The high is around 70 degrees Fahrenheit and the temp gets down to about 45 at night.  It rains a lot so if you are not into that this is not the place for you, but the weather is always pleasant.  No brutal summers or winters to deal with, it’s like the first days of spring every day.

2.       Walkable-The pleasant climate in Bogota is one of the things that make the city very walkable.    You will find pedestrians everywhere in this crowded bustling city of almost 10 million inhabitants.  Every neighborhood is a microcosm of the larger city so you can walk to most anything that you need.  If you are feeling lazy though you can always jump into one of the thousands of yellow taxis. 

3.       Mountains-Everywhere you go in the city you will have spectacular views of the lush, green mountains; they are inescapable.  Situated at the top of the Andes Mountain Range, the mountains of Colombia are by far some of the most beautiful in the world.  The city of Bogota sits at about 8,000 feet above sea level. 

4.       Crispeta-This may seem random but in my opinion totally worth mentioning.  Crispeta dulce is a gift from the gods.  At most movie theaters here you can get crispeta salada (salted popcorn) or crispeta dulce (sort of like caramel kettle corn) for about $2US.  Let me say that the crispeta dulce is to die for.  I go to the movies about once a week largely for the crispeta dulce. 

5.       Panaderias-Just about every neighborhood has a panaderia where they bake fresh bread and sweets every day.  Pan de bono, almojabana, pan yucca, pan integral, croissants are all freshly baked every morning.  I myself prefer the chocolate croissants from my local panaderia. 

6.       Empleadas-There are literally thousands of women in this city who work as empleadas or maids ready to clean your house from top to bottom, cook lunch from scratch and care for your children at extremely reasonable rates.  An American could get really spoiled here. 

7.       Cultural-Bogota is a large bustling metropolis with many international visitors but it has not forgotten its heritage.  There are great museums like Museo del Oro, theater productions and the national library houses the largest collection in Latin America. 

8.       Kid friendly-The city has lots to do for kids.  One of our favorite places is Parque Museo del Chico.  This is sort of like a mini Central Park.  It has an old colonial style wall enclosing it so your kids cannot escape!  In a large city where space is at premium parks like this one are great because they offer grass for your kids to run and play on.  There is even an old London style double decker bus with a little café inside of it. 

9.       Day/weekend trips-If you get tired of all that Bogota and its mild climate have to offer you can always take quick trip down the mountain to places like Melgar where the weather is warm and you can relax and swim at one of its many resorts or “fincas”. 

10.   People are really polite, like in Texas-Last but certainly not least people are really, really polite here.  This is something you don’t often find outside of the southern United States and this Texan appreciates that.  Everyone says thank you and please, yes sir, no ma’am.  It is a chivalrous, respectful culture and I love that because it makes me feel like this city is my home at least for the foreseeable future.